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BOFH Earlier

BOFH: How long does it take to complete Friday's lager-related tasks?

Episode 17 'I bloody hate time management applications'

BOFH: We're miracle workers. But you want us to fix THAT in 10 minutes?

Episode 16 Psst. I can make your network super secure...

BOFH: I'm not doing this for the benefit of your health, you know

Episode 15 Has no one noted how incredibly dangerous the windows are around here?

BOFH: Press 1. Press 2. Press whatever you damn well LIKE

Episode 14 On the helldesk, nobody can hear you scream

BOFH: Power corrupts, uninterrupted power corrupts absolutely

Episode 13 The best things in life are free, or at least come when there's no charge

BOFH: An architect and his own entirely avoidable downfall

Episode 12 Office remodellings get lost in time. Like... tears. In rain

BOFH: Why, I LOVE work courses. Please tell me more, o wise one!

Episode 11 Leadership styles ... I like Hugo Boss suits and people waving at me?

BOFH: Knitting bobble hats on the steps of the guillotine

Episode 10 While the Boss happily skips up the steps and puts his neck on the block

BOFH: My diary is MINE and mine alone, you petty HR gimps

Episode 9 Read carefully before bursting in here like that

BOFH: Don't go changing on Friday evenings, I don't wanna work that hard

Episode 8 Please refer to the procedures, I like things just the way they are

BOFH: Step into my office. Now take a deep breath

Episode 7 A veteran of the bore wars proves very hard to kill

BOFH: Getting to the brown, nutty heart of the water cooler matter

Episode 6 All that glistens is not gold... something else

BOFH: Explain? All we need is this kay-sh with DDR3 Cortexiphan ...

Episode 5 You opened Pandora's Box, you shut it again

BOFH: Never mind that old brick, look at this ink-stained BEAUTY

Episode 4 Swapsies? Oh go on. Go oooooonnnnn

BOFH: Mmm, gotta love me some fresh BYOD dog roll

Episode 3 Dog roll? Sit down before we tell you...

BOFH: The ONE-NINE uptime solution

Episode 2 Yes, 9%. AAAND the server just crashed... literally

BOFH: The Great HellDesk geek leave seek

Episode 1 Is that leave without absence, or absence without leave?

BOFH: A miracle on PFY Street

Episode 17 Secret Santa shamescapades...

BOFH: Capo di tutti capi, bah. I'm having CHICKEN JALFREZI

Episode 16 Avé! Duci Novo ...

BOFH: Santa, bloody Santa

Episode 15 Bodily violence? PLEASE. I was protecting the children

BOFH: Everyone deserves a little DOWNTIME

Episode 14 Titsup tech holiday special

BOFH: WHERE did this 'fax-enabled' printer UPGRADE come from?

Episode 13 Don't worry about that cable, it's part of the config

BOFH: An UNHOLY MATCH forged amid the sweet smell of bullsh*t

Episode 12 Top dog, meet the Queen of the Hounds

BOFH: SOOO... You want to sell us some antivirus software?

Episode 11 And allow your foul spoor to besmirch our hard drives...

BOFH: Stop your tiers – when it comes to storage, less is more

Episode 10 Hierarchical storage? Why you had only to ask, Boss

BOFH: The current value of our IT ASSets? Minus eleventy-seven...

Episode 9 Oh Beancounter, don't make us get the hose

BOFH: We CAN do that with a Raspberry Pi, but think of the BODIES

Episode 8 11 mins? 12 mins? SPARE ME the CHOICES

BOFH: The Great Backup BACKDOWN

Episode 7 'We have to be sure the system works!'

BOFH: You can take our lives, but you'll never take OUR MACROS

Episode 6 Never mind the blood, Mr Beancounter: MAGIC BEANS!

BOFH: On the contrary, we LOVE rebranding here at the IT dept

Episode 5 Which of our branding irons impresses you most?

BOFH: Oh DO tell us what you think. *CLICK*

Episode 4 $%%&amp Oh dear, we've been cut *CLICK* Well hello *CLICK* You're breaking up...

BOFH: On the PFY's Scottish estate, no one can hear you scream...

Episode 3 If a tree falls in a forest, and Simon's behind you with an axe...

BOFH: He... made... you... HE made YOU a DOMAIN ADMIN?

Episode 2 Simon, are you breathing? Simon!

BOFH: Attractive person is attractive. Um, why are your eyes bulging?

Episode 1 Couple's therapy at Mission Central

BOFH: It's DANGEROUS to go alone. Take THIS

Episode 13 It's FRY-DAY at Mission Central

BOFH: Resistance is futile - we're missing BEER O'CLOCK

Episode 12 Torture you, that's good, that's a good idea, I like that one...

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