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Bootnotes Earlier

There is no perceived IT generation gap: Young people really are thick

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Grumble grumble where's me suet pudding in Bovril etc

Size does matter, chaps: Oversized todgers an evolutionary handicap

Boffins find supersized bits do not stand the test of time

Car-crash television: 'Excuse me ma'am, do you speak English?' 'Yes I do,' replies AMD's CEO

Martin Brundle left red-faced after Chinese Grand Prix snafu

UK pub chain Wetherspoons' last call: ♫ Just a spoonful of Twitter – let's pull social media down ♫

God, what kind of digital business are they running?

The first rule of maths class: Don't start a fight club

Teacher nabbed for allegedly allowing kids to give each other a 'bunch of fives'*

Best thing about a smart toilet? You can take your mobile in without polluting it

Something for the Weekend, Sir? It really makes you sit and think, doesn't it?

Donkey Wrong: Arcade legend Billy Mitchell booted from record books amid MAME row

Eye-popping scores were thanks to emulators – claim

'Dear Mr F*ckingjoking': UK PM Theresa May's mass marketing missive misses mark

Party apologises after begging letter topped by 'offensive' name

Penis pothole protester: Cambridge's 'Wanksy' art shows feted

Resident: 'We can see those potholes coming now'

Snubbed R Us: Microsoft eschews Vulture Consultants in Playmobil tech research

MS 'toy lovers' create sensor mat with NFC-tagged thesps

El Reg needs you – to help build an automated beer-transporting robot

We're thirsty and comfy and there's work to do and it's faaar

German sauna drags punters to court over naked truth

Two people in one changing room? Nein und €600 fine

Fear the Reaper: Man hospitalised after eating red hot chilli pepper

Competitive eater bit off more than he could chew

UK 'wife'-carrying champion named

Couple will represent Blighty at international contest in Finland

My Tibetan digital detox lasted one morning, how about yours?

Something for the Weekend, Sir? It can be cold and lonely at the tip

My PC makes ‘negative energy waves’, said user, then demanded fix

On-Call Ignorance of the giant radio antennae atop the office building was bliss

Are meta, self-referential or recursive science-fiction films doomed?

They're certainly difficult to make well

Danish Navy expert finds no trace of exhaust gas in private submarine

Peter Madsen's explanation for death of Kim Wall contested

Commonwealth Games brochure declares that England is now in Africa

I bless the rains down in Tunbridge Wells...

2001 set the standard for the next 50 years of hard (and some soft) sci-fi

How movie magic was achieved long before the arrival of CGI

Which? leads decrepit email service behind barn, single shot rings out over valley

Users fuming... if only they had a consumer champion to turn to

2001: A Space Odyssey has haunted pop culture with anxiety about rogue AIs for half a century

But Stanley Kubrick and Arthur C Clarke's monument could've been a very different beast

Super Cali goes ballistic, Starbucks is on notice: Expensive milky coffee is something quite cancerous

Even now your java kills you – man, these rules are bogus

Happy 100th birthday to the Royal Air Force

What's the RAF ever done for us, apart from being born on April Fool's Day?

The Register Opera Company presents: The Pirates of Penzance, Sysadmin edition

On-Call Easter Special A fellow reader ♬ Is the very model of an ICT professional ♬

Please no Basic Instinct flashing, HPE legal eagles warn staffers

Who wears the pants round here? We all do when on stage

London's Postal Museum takes letter-opener to watery WWII mailbag

Torpedoed ship's missives opened 77 years later

Are you able to read this headline? Then you're not Julian Assange. His broadband is unplugged

Ecuador puts WikiLeaks boss in digital time-out over comments

There are 10 types of people in the world, but there is only one Melvyn

Stob Verity puts a Bragg in your shell-like

Skip-wrecked! Boat full o' rubbish scuppered in Brit residential street

The 'last thing you want' when selling up, sighs neighbour

April FAIL as IETF's funny-but-dodgy draft doc arrives a week early

Holy Hand Grenade proposes update to RFC 8140 but blows back on the court of King Arthur

Google gives its $1m Turing prize to, er, top Google bods: RISC men Hennessy, Patterson

Silicon Valley boffins bag Nobel Prize of computer science

You must be yolking: English pub to launch eggstravagent Yorkshire pudding

Cracking idea or chocolate-coated nightmare?

Nip/Tug: Plastic surgeon accused of mid-surgery 'hardcore' smut binge

Come for the nose job, stay for the... denials of any wrongdoing

Cyborg fined for riding train without valid ticket

Subcutaneous smart card doesn’t cut it in Sydney

Boeing ships its 10,000th 737

Airlines want another 4,600 of the single-aisle workhorse that debuted in 1967

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