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Bootnotes

Ex-NASA bod on Gwyneth Paltrow site's 'healing' stickers: 'Wow. What a load of BS'

Paltrow, we have a problem

Genoans flout terror ban with bumper basil hand baggage policy

Sauce on a plane

Canadian sniper makes kill shot at distance of 3.5 KILOMETRES

He'd have been aiming higher than the top of London's Shard to hit his mark

Researchers take the piss with pee-powered liquid energy project

Bill Gates' cistern system uses your personal recharger

Hotheaded Brussels civil servants issued with cool warning: Leak

Brexit? No, no... it's baking! Put away the booze, biz-suit

When corporate signage goes BAD

LogoBotch The Cisco slip of 2010

AWS launches celebrity-spotting-as-a-service: What a time to be alive

Cloud can now ID 'hundreds of thousands' of athletes, pollies, actors, struggles with oiled butt

Swedish school pumps up volume to ease toilet trauma

Don't blush, just flush

Hyperloop One teases idea of 50-minute London-Edinburgh ride

Reveals candidate European routes, two tunnels under the Med, under under Baltic Sea

Class clowns literally classless: Harvard axes meme-flinging morons

Uni gives kids a lesson they'll never forget after spreading stupidity on Facebook

Oil and lube firm offers to ease pains of frustrated office workers

Emo Oil targets overheated marketeers and frigid FM specialists alike

Utah fights man's attempt to marry laptop

Foe of same-sex unions seeks to wed machine

German robo-pastor preaches the GNU Testament

Bless me father for I have SYNTAX ERROR

IBM marketeers rub out chopper after visit from CEO Ginni

Not a good fit. Apparently

I'll take the sandtrooper in white: Meet the rebel scum making Star Wars armour sets for a living

Star Wars New Hope @ 40 Short of £180,000? These guys will sort you out

WannaLaugh? Funsters port WannaCrypt to Commodore, Cisco, Nintendo and Tesla

Some folk have Photoshop and too much time on their hands

The revolution will not be televised: How Lucas modernised audio in film

Star Wars New Hope @ 40 Thank God for Jedi (and other words I thought I'd never use)

Walkers' Crisps pulls backfiring Tweet campaign that paired Gary Lineker and a bunch of nasties

Pranksters game promo to feature sex crims, murderers, terrorists....

Industrial Light & Magic: 40 years of Lucas's pioneering FX-wing

Star Wars New Hope @ 40 The roots of multithreaded rendering software

'Odour' from AnalTech ramming leads to hazmat team callout

Some might say this is fake news. It isn't

Armstrong's moon-purse set for $4m bid-off

One small bag for a man, one giant check for Sotheby's

IT firms guilty of blasting customers with soul-numbing canned music

That's rich, coming from an audio-branded-call-handling biz

Vegemite tries to hijack Qantas name-our-planes competition

He just smiled and gave me... er, a copy of the Ts and Cs

After stiffing us with Trump, Weiner 'fesses to underage cock shot rot

'I have a sickness,' former politician notices while facing two years in chokey

Man sues date for cinema texting fiasco, demands $17.31

'Defendant’s behaviour is a threat to civilised society', claims Texan

White House sicko sent down for 20 years after sexting underage girls

No, not who you're thinking of. Sad!

Leeds cops issue appeal for man-sized todger

Pricking your memory, anyone?

Train station's giant screens showed web smut at peak hour

The 17:21 to Happy Town is going in and out and is aaah-aah-bout to finish its journey

MP3 'died' and nobody noticed: Key patents expire on golden oldie tech

And Fraunhofer won't renew 'em

Blighty bloke: PC World lost my Mac Mini – and trolled my blog!

Retailer accused of acting like a real bunch of Dixons

Giant spawn hammer on Antarctica map. Thanks, Google Waze

Updated Crowdsourcing is the future of (pubic) navigation

Have a go with this WW2 German Lorenz cipher machine – in your browser

Fancy a crack at being Germany's secret signalman?

US Coast Guard: We're rather chuffed with our new Boeing spy drone

Meanwhile Britain is binning it. Well done, admirals

Huge flying arse makes successful test flight

Nine months after its buttocks ignominiously met terra firma

Fancy a relaxed boozy holiday? Keep well away from Great Britain

Nanny State Index reveals just how hectored we are by modern-day Puritans

$6,000 for tours of apocalyptic post-Brexit London? WTF, NYT?

Bless the Cousins, they're trying really hard with this one

Fake ruse: USA Today calls the FBI after half of its 15m Facebook Likes turn out to be bogus

No one real likes us, whines hotel doorstop provider

Italian F-35 facility rolls out its first STOVL stealth fighter

Same place that Blighty's dented jets will get their T-Cut

We are 'heroes,' says police chief whose force frisked a photographer

Brit plod used Terrorism Act to collar snapper. Hello, 2005

Spend your paper £5 notes NOW: No longer legal tender after today

Get yourself a fistful of plastic fantastics instead

What augmented reality was created for: An ugly drink with a balloon

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Or you could roll over and go back to sleep

Fire fighters get grinding on London man’s trapped genitalia

Ilford fire tender attends an East Ender with trapped bellend...ugh...

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