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 Donald Trump . Editorial use only. Editorial Credit: a katz / Shutterstock.com

TRUMP SCANDAL! No, not that one. Or that one. Or that one. Or that one.

Hackers target The Donald's businesses

bubble

Bitcoin exchange Coinbase crashes after Asian buying frenzy

Japanese investors rush in after cryptocurrency was made legal

Tech firms sends Congress checklist of surveillance reforms

Google, Facebook et al take on Section 702, Apple quiet

handshake_648

Done and done: BlackBerry ties up $940m settlement with Qualcomm

Patent case wraps up as sides agree on final tally

Titanic sinking

The hold is filled with storage news! Grab a bucket and BAIL

Keelhauling through the week's movers and shakers

Australian Taxation Office won't penalise Plutus contractors

If payroll operator accused of AU$165m scam didn't pay, neither will contractors

Aruba bugs squashed in seven-vuln splatfest

ClearPass Policy Manager needs upgrade

Raspberry Pi foundation merges with CoderDojo Foundation

Two coding-for-kids orgs already overlapped, now plan joint acceleration

Arista-cats win some, lose some against Cisco

Upside: it could be all over by September

US laptops-on-planes ban may extend to flights from ALL nations

'Real, sophisticated, threat' may mean ban on flights to and from USA says Homeland Security head John Kelly

BA's 'global IT system failure' is due to 'power supply issue'

All flights from Gatwick and Heathrow cancelled

Sergey Brin building humanitarian blimp for lifesaving leisure

You may have to wait a decade or more to join him aloft

British prime minister slams Facebook and pals for votes

Nothing new in speech but then that wasn't the point

Andy Rubin teases next week's launch of Essential phone

Is it a Tango? Is it a 360-camera? Or is it a let-down?

Chipotle: Hackers did to our registers what our burritos did to your colon

Fast food chain cops to POS malware breach

Your job might be automated within 120 years, AI experts reckon

Even AI researcher jobs at risk by the year 2105

TRUMP SCANDAL! No, not that one. Or that one. Or that one. Or that one.

Hackers target The Donald's businesses

Bitcoin exchange Coinbase crashes after Asian buying frenzy

Japanese investors rush in after cryptocurrency was made legal

Done and done: BlackBerry ties up $940m settlement with Qualcomm

Patent case wraps up as sides agree on final tally

Tech firms sends Congress checklist of surveillance reforms

Google, Facebook et al take on Section 702, Apple quiet

It was bound to happen: Amazon launches first grocery store

Buy your bread n' butter from the Bezos Bunch

The hold is filled with storage news! Grab a bucket and BAIL

Keelhauling through the week's movers and shakers

Pirates hack was a hoax, says Disney boss

'You are without a doubt the worst pirate I’ve ever heard of'

Sainsbury's IT glitch spoils bank holiday food orders

Hoping to stock up for a barbecue? Tough

Brocade goes bye-bye: Out on a high note ahead of Broadcom slurp

+Comment Revenues increase as it faces dismemberment

'Do not tell Elon': Ex-SpaceX man claims firm cut corners on NASA part tests

Firm: Not what he was saying before we sacked him

'President Zuck' fundraiser opens for business

"I'm Commander-in-Chief, bitch!"

Hyper-converged trashes all-flash: Nutanix out-grows Pure Storage

$100m+ quarterly loss fuels relentless drive for growth

Scientists are counting atoms to figure out when Mars last had volcanoes

Astroboffin-in-training makes dating breakthrough

‪WannaCry‬pt ransomware note likely written by Google Translate-using Chinese speakers

Signs of machine translation spotted by analysts

Apple fights off iTunes patent spat appeal

That bit where you said we didn't have to give them $500m – stick with that

Ouch! Latest Qualcomm sueball comes from ... its own shareholders

Legal flingball fingers Snapdragon 810 debacle

'Major incident' at Capita data centre: Multiple services still knackered

Still on knees some 36 hours later

What happened when 300 DevOps experts took over the QE II?

Events Continuous Lifecycle: Fill-up with speaker videos, slides

The revolution will not be televised: How Lucas modernised audio in film

Star Wars New Hope @ 40 Thank God for Jedi (and other words I thought I'd never use)

El Reg straps on the Huawei Watch 2

Real World Test Sports ready, LTE ready, but still a solution looking for a problem?

Life is... pushing all the right buttons on the wrong remote control

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Or I could press 'Play' via the evil internet

Sysadmin finds insecure printer, remotely prints 'Fix Me!' notice

ON-CALL Once you're through the web interface the email-to-printer address is easy to find

Japanese lab's 'value-aware' SSDs last longer, recognise images faster

Special error correction techniques work around degrading drives' dying cells

Windows 10 love to see PC market grow again. Future iPhone to be clear. Elvis to re-appear

Analyst firm IDC just made one of these three improbable predictions for the year 2019

Battery-hungry cars roll over Lenovo's FY 16/17 bottom line

Data centre unit 'still under transformation' and losing money, as is mobile business

IBM asks contractors to take a pay cut

Exclusive Big Blue is 'shifting service delivery model to dedicated employee workforce' but clients aren't happy

Init freedom declared as systemd-free Devuan hits stable 1.0.0 status

POLL Devuan 'Jessie' is done and will get long term support beyond the life of Debian Jessie

Don't rely on fitness trackers to track number of calories burned

Study shows energy readings off over 90%

Juno's first data causing boffins to rewrite the text books on Jupiter

Sadly no black monolith found

T-Mobile goes Apple/Google route by separating phone numbers and devices

'Digits' marks a shift for the phone industry

Congresscritters float benefits for gig workers

Bill would let contractors get unemployment and paid leave

Apple has finally found someone to support HomeKit

But Belkin's new bridge only reinforces the problem of a locked-down ecosystem

Three Nigerians sentenced to 235 years in prison for online scamming

Don't expect princely borrowing emails to stop any time soon

US citizens complain their names were used for FCC robo-comments

Allegedly astroturfed Americans speak out over net neutrality filings

Microsoft court victory prompts call for data-grabbing regime

Legislators mull over modernizing legal process for seizing cloud data

Astroboffins spot a new type of galaxy bursting with stars

Star formation rate is a hundred times faster than our Milky Way

Venezuela increases internet censorship and surveillance in crisis

Latin American country going the China route

Cloudflare doubles down on its troll-hunting crusade

Bounty for invalidating Blackbird Tech patents increases

Capita payments service Pay360 goes TITSUP

'Major incident' in data centre

Domains tainted by RoughTed malvertising reap half a billion hits

Some of which comes from Alexa top 500 websites

Walkers' Crisps pulls backfiring Tweet campaign that paired Gary Lineker and a bunch of nasties

Pranksters game promo to feature sex crims, murderers, terrorists....

Pure's punchy first fiscal 2017 quarter opens door to billion-dollar year

Moving into co-processing with the big 3 public cloud players

HP Inc CEO reports 'breakthrough' quarter as PC sales shoot up

Look at me go, Mum!

Captain Kurian steers good ship NetApp back on course after $8m loss

Final quarter is third in a row to show revenue and profit growth

Auntie sh!tcans BBC Store after 18 months

Customers offered Amazon vouchers or a full refund

NHS Digital stopped short of advising against paying off WannaCrypt

Trusts may have had corrupted backups... or none at all

EU pegs quota for 'homegrown' content on Netflix at 30 per cent

Streaming service argues it'll result in lower quality work

Drones over London caused aviation chaos, pilots' reports reveal

Heathrow flights were diverted to avoid errant UAVs

Nokia's retro revival 3310 goes on sale and disappears immediately

People must really love Snake

Info commish: One year to go and businesses still not ready for GDPR

Thought £400k TalkTalk fine was big? Try €20m

Lenovo UK boss pulls the chain, flushes himself out of there

Exclusive Wang gets the call to arms, stands to attention

'Cloak and dagger' vuln rolls critical hit against latest Android versions

Updated Malicious combination of legitimate permissions

The joy and the pain of buying IT

Study Those bloody procurement guys did what?

Distro watch for Ubuntu lovers: What's ahead in Linux land

Elementary OS, my dear penguin?

Industrial Light & Magic: 40 years of Lucas's pioneering FX-wing

Star Wars New Hope @ 40 The roots of multithreaded rendering software

Your roadmap to the Google vs Oracle Java wars

Analysis 'It is happening again'

RightNow founder turned politician gets assault charge after 'bodyslamming' reporter

Greg Gianforte loses it on election eve

DARPA orders spaceplane capable of 10 launches in 10 days

Boeing to build 'Phantom Express' on heir to Space Shuttle's main engine

UK ministers to push anti-encryption laws after election

Anger over Manchester attack may play a part

Orbital boffins cut four years off NASA mission to shiniest object in the Solar System

16 Psyche mission takes a great leap forward

Apple asks FCC to let it run mm-wave tests - for backhaul?!

No, Apple is not practicing to be carrier. This is how you horn in on 5G

Windows is now built on Git, but Microsoft has found some bottlenecks

300 GB repo handles 8,421 pulls and 1,760 official builds a day, more once GVFS fix is in

Ransomware hits Australian hospitals after botched patch

WannaCry? Minister says data is safe, so save your tears for now

Rackspace demotes a CEO to hire a CEO to replace CEO who quit

Former HO and EMC man Joe Eazor gets the job of completing conversion to services company

Attempt at building kinder, gentler Reddit downvoted off the Web

Chat forums beyond El Reg just do respectful whimsy, so goodbye 'Imzy'

Fat-thumbed dev slashes Samba security

Remote code execution in all versions since 3.5.0, so it's patching time!

Machine 1, Man 0: AlphaGo slams world's best Go player in the first round

DeepMind scores another win in marketing its AI

Uber New York class action alleges passengers overcharged $7.43m per month

Dial-a-ride d-baggery claimed on passenger side too

Google, Lyft, IBM mix microservices into management mesh

Kubernetes cluster cat herding, brought to you by Istio

FCC revised net neutrality rules reveal cable company control of process

Analysis We take a look inside the campaign to undermine the internet

Democracy-minded DEF CON hackers promise punishing probe on US election computers

Voting machine hacking could turn very ugly

Feeling Locky, punk? Ransomware grew eight-fold last year

Days of future past

Schiaparelli probe crash caused by excessive spin, report concludes

Lander exercise was 'very close' to a success

Intel pitches a Thunderbolt 3-for-all

Chipzilla says USB standard will be open to the world

Twilio packages code boilerplate to woo devs

Call proxy service aims to appeal to businesses with mobile workers

Costs v sales agent? Not just yet, judge tells Retro Computers Ltd

ZX Spectrum-themed game console firm didn't quite win court order, either

HPE flashes out 3PAR, Nimble and MSA kit

Joins Dell EMC, NetApp, Pure to upgrade all-flash arrays

Hitachi exits mainframe hardware but will collab with IBM on z Systems

Big Blue's big iron to be loaded with Hitachi's OS software

Huawei missed memo that PC's dead – so here are three new notebooks

Hands On Touchscreens? Who needs 'em?

HPE's Nimble Secondary Flash Array uses... disk?

Analysis What are they banging on about?

Google now mingles everything you've bought with everywhere you've been

(And everything you've seen) Welcome to 'Closing the Loop'

Are telcos' customers expecting too much of IoT connectivity techs?

Also, here's why LTE-M gained ground over NB-IoT in Europe

Dixons Carphone: Brexit not a factor as Brits' gadget lust holds strong

Gloom and doom? Consumers still shopping with us, trills CEO

WDC flashes the cash in in Tosh Memory biz bid: 2 treeellion yen

+Comment Partners with state-backed Japanese funds

64-bit malware threat may be itty-bitty now, but it's only set to grow

Upgrade and they will come

'Odour' from AnalTech ramming leads to hazmat team callout

Some might say this is fake news. It isn't

AI-powered dynamic pricing turns its gaze to the fuel pumps

Analysis Shopping as a constant poker game

Speaking in Tech: Depressing WannaCrypt postmortem edition

Podcast At least we'll always have #catsinteslas

8 out of 10 cats fear statistics – AI doesn't have this problem

Use and abuse of figures

PAH! Four decades of Star Wars: No lightsabers, no palm-sized video calls

Star Wars New Hope @ 40 Sort of. Leia's a New Hope

Facebook shares own tools to trap bugs before they break code

Test management and debugging at scale become a bit less daunting

Channel luvvie Martin Hellawell set to check out of Softcat. Sort of

IPO? Ticked. 1,079% growth in 11 years? Ticked. Lost the tightness? Nah

Britain's on the brink of a small-scale nuclear reactor revolution

Sure, there are hurdles, but no £18bn hole on the other side like Hinkley Point

Network-sniffing, automation, machine learning: How to get better threat intel

When two 'innocent' events on the network are anything but

GPU-flingers' bash: Forget the Matrix, Neo needs his tensors

HPC blog What's a tensor? Glad you asked...

EU ministers approve anti-hate speech video rules

Facebook, Google, Twitter and friends face clampdown

Google starts enterprise support for Chrome, including top SaaS apps

Lobs deployment tools at sysadmins, complete with Silverlight and ActiveX support

LinkedIn finds friends to join its 'Open19' data centre standards effort

Stacks up against Open Compute with one design for data centres of all sizes plan

India makes biometrics mandatory for all e-gov projects

Cloud's just 'recommended', for now, as local industry plans 50 per cent growth by 2025

Google wants to track your phone and credit card through meatspace

World's biggest advertising company needs to prove ads are worth the money

Dodge this: Fiat-Chrysler gets diesel-fuelled sueball from DoJ

Emissions software scandal flares anew

Bluemix gives users two months to adopt new rolling deployment tool

Active Deploy binned in favour of Kubernetes and/or Cloud Foundry

What's got a vast attack surface and runs on Linux? Windows Defender, of course

Penguinistas, rejoice: Tavis Ormandy lets you fuzz Windows

How good are selfies these days? Good enough to fool Samsung Galaxy S8 biometrics

Iris-scanner defeated with a camera in night mode, a contact lens, and a printer

Java Daddy James Gosling goes to work for Amazon Web Services

He left Oracle years ago so this is no biggie, but clearly cloud is where big brains want to roost

Last week: 'OpenVPN client is secure!'
This week: 'Unpatched bug in OpenVPN server'

And it's a nasty one if the user you crack has admin rights

Armstrong's moon-purse set for $4m bid-off

One small bag for a man, one giant check for Sotheby's

Target inks $18.5m deal with US states to settle 2013 data breach

Fines equal around 8 hours of profit, that'll teach them

Particle boffins calculate new constraints for probability of finding dark matter

Axions still a no-show over at CERN Axion Telescope

Bloodbath at LeEco US as Chinese tech upstart implodes with layoffs

Kiss goodbye to that Android bike and Transformers car

Uber found to be doing something awful? Yep, it's Tuesday

Dial-a-ride house admits underpaying New York drivers

Republicans' net neutrality attack written by… you guessed it, the cable lobby

Metadata confirms what we all suspected

NSA takes one-two punch to the face

Two sets of judges rule for citizens and against government

Comcast accused of siccing lawyers on net neutrality foe

Activists say they got cease and desist threat for pointing out astroturfing

Redmond puts wall around Windows 10 for Chinese government edition

Middle Kingdom mandarins get their own OS

It's just 'Pro' now, guys: Microsoft gives Surface a subtle resurfacing

Boutique fondleslab gains SIM slot... but not until later this year

IoT standards? We've got 'em. And if you don't like those, we got more

Cities sick of being used as techies' sandboxes

Capita and Birmingham City Council 'dissolve' joint venture

Won't somebody think of the savings? Oh, they have, and now the dream has died

Media players wide open to malware fired from booby-trapped subtitles

VLC, Kodi, Popcorn Time and Stremio were all vulnerable

Travel IT giant Amadeus making eyes at Micron's SolidScale architecture

Analysis Global biz is flying to fast-access frames of flash

Widow appeals to Avaya to protect death benefits after bankruptcy filing

Telco argues payment isn't covered by reorg scheme

Health data 'vault' app floats into UK.gov's G-Cloud. *cough* GDPR *cough*

Anyone interested? NHS? Bueller? Bueller?

DJI: Register your drones or no more cool flying vids for you

Firm will kill live in-flight streaming unless you hand over your details

Three-quarters of IoT projects are failing, says Cisco

But don't let poor proof of concept and insecurity put you off...

.Science and .study: Domains of the bookish? More like domains of the JERKS!

Only few bad apples at internet badness hotspots, though

Nokia, Apple lawyers make peace over nasty IP wrangle

Unspecified lump sum heading for Finland

IT firms guilty of blasting customers with soul-numbing canned music

That's rich, coming from an audio-branded-call-handling biz

China's phone quartet is shouldering its way into Western markets

Huawei breathing creepily down Apple's neck

'The internet is slow'... How to keep users happy, get more work done

Get the basics right

Euro Patent Office staff warns board of internal rule changes

King Battistelli is at it again

IBM's ShinyHappy™ SAP Ariba deal papers over SaaS fail

Emptoris procurement product is being taken behind the shed just five years after acquisition

Mouse sperm kept frozen in SPAAAAACE yields healthy pups

Astronaut reproduction could be possible one day, boffins reckon

Go ahead, stage a hackathon. But pray it doesn't work too well

OPINION Are you ready for an idea from the playground to challenge your organisation?

AppDynamics pondering 'business-aware infrastructure'

Customers fleeing your e-store before buying? Your data centre should know how to respond

EU security think tank ENISA looks for IoT security, can't find any

Proposes baseline security spec, plus stickers to prove thing-makers have complied

Russian raids sweep up 20 malware scum

Cron job aborted after crims scoop ₽50m and share it to 6,000 bank accounts

'Tabby's Star' intrigues astro-boffins with brief 'dimming event'

Is it comets? Or aliens? Astronomers want your help to figure out this cosmic riddle

PayPal peed off about Pandora's 'P' being mistaken for its 'PP'

LOGOWATCH LEGAL PayPal says Pandora can't make cash without cashing in on its fame

Amazon Drive bans rclone storage client

Presence of encrypted keys in source code runs afoul of rules

Chinese e-tailer beats Amazon to the skies with one-ton delivery drones

Bezos fumes as US bureaucracy holds his drone fleet back

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