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London BMW 5-Series police car

Hello, police, El Reg here. Are we a bunch of terrorists now?

Do Brits risk arrest for watching beheading video nasty? We asked the fuzz

Regina Egbert, El Reg's virtual news anchor

The Register to boldly go where no Vulture has gone before: The WEEKEND

No more aching 2-day void to wait through each week

TV transport tech, part 1: From server to sofa at the touch of a button

Feature You won't believe how much goes into today's telly tech

Heartbleed implicated in US hospital megahack

This time superbug has nothing to do with MRSA

Stand clear! Will HTC's One act as a defibrillator for Windows Phone?

Analysis Low end success, high end boredom

Samsung bags second Internet of Home Stuff home firm in a week

US electronics division slurps heating and A/C distie Quietside

WTH? Upstart stuffed with ex-VMware bods grilled on Amazon cloud 'rescue' plan

Interview Platform9's co-founder on how they started a new biz

Stand clear! Will HTC's One act as a defibrillator for Windows Phone?

Analysis Low end success, high end boredom

Hello, police, El Reg here. Are we a bunch of terrorists now?

Do Brits risk arrest for watching beheading video nasty? We asked the fuzz

Felony charges? Harsh! Alleged Anon hackers plead guilty to misdemeanours

US judge questions harsh sentence sought by prosecutors

Can it be true? A BIG DATA benchmark? Yes, says TPC

Vendor-neutral stats for tech's biggest meaningless buzzword

Apple to build WORLD'S BIGGEST iStore in Dubai

It's not the size of your shiny-shiny...

I don't see dead people: Twitter to yank some images of deceased folk

Family members can submit takedown requests

Heartbleed implicated in US hospital megahack

This time superbug has nothing to do with MRSA

Citrix drizzles lightly and briefly on VMware's parade with Xen update

Xen App and Desktop get refreshes and native Chrome OS Receiver returns

UK.gov sinks another £1.6m into Internet of Stuff spec HyperCat

Blighty consortium gets additional funding

The Register to boldly go where no Vulture has gone before: The WEEKEND

No more aching 2-day void to wait through each week

Speaking in Tech: Meet the man who SURRENDERED to Facebook

Podcast Cloud architect tells Regcast: 'It owns my entire life'

Video of US journalist 'beheading' pulled from social media

Yanked footage featured British-accented attacker and US journo James Foley

Creaky PC? SanDisk gives users a NAND with speedy '3-bitter' SSD

Tart it up with a TLC retrofit

Brother, can you spare a DIME for holy grail of secure webmail?

Feature Lavabit man's new project: One of security's thorniest problems

The agony and ecstasy of SteamOS: WHERE ARE MY GAMES?

Game Theory And yes it does need a fat HDD (or SSD, it's cool with either)

Look, no client! Not quite: the long road to a webbified Vim

Programming the Web, Pt. III Building in the browser

Wall Street woes: Oh noes, tech titans aren't using bankers

Worstall on Wednesday Get out your hankies: Facebook, Google use in-house teams

Xennet wants YOUR machines for tradable supercomputer cloud

SETI@home, Bitcoin the inspirations

Power of iPhone 6 hype-gasm: Apple a sniff away from record stock high

Peak Apple Split share price threatening to reach 2012 apex

Malware married to software in undetectable attack

Boffins demo how traffic redirect can endanger code downloads

Kate Bush: Don't make me HAVE CONTACT with your iPHONE

Can't face sea of wobbling fondle implements. What happened to lighters, eh?

Gigantic toothless 'DRAGONS' dominated Earth's early skies

Gummy pterosaurs outlived toothy competitors

Intel's Haswell-E brain to emerge from the lab at end of August – reports

Motherboards spotted in the wild, it seems

Lazy sysadmins rooted in looming Mozilla cert wipeout

CA maintainer warns 'check your infrastructure'

'Leccy racer whacks petrols in Oz race

ELMOFO rakes in two wins in sanctioned race

Uh, Obama? Did you miss a zero or two off Samsung's Chinese supplier 'fib' settlement?

No? OK. Tech giant will go ahead and write a $2.3m check

Astronomers scramble for obs on new comet

Amateur gets fifth confirmed discovery

VMware shuffles the executive deckchairs

Big guns Eschenbach and Chadwick aimed at growth markets

Cryptolocker flogged on YouTube

Cat video encrypts all the things

Tech patent hoarder Intellectual Ventures to lose a fifth of its trolls

Layoffs hit licensing powerhouse

Rubber Ub' hub: Uber test-drives condoms, gift card, soap etc deliveries

Get drugstore stuff in a hurry – like it's a 1999 dotcom bubble all over again

US TV stations bowl sueball directly at FCC's spectrum mega-sale

Broadcasters upset about coverage and cost as they shift up and down the dials

Dozens of COPS cuffed in Turkish Prime Minister's wiretap probe

Plod accused of illegally snooping on top govt officials

Microsoft and HTC are M8s again: New One mobe sports WinPhone

Just a couple of little catches, though

Ballmer quits Microsoft board to spend more time with his b-balls

From Clippy to Clippers: Hi, I see you're running an NBA team now ...

Intel's Raspberry Pi rival Galileo can now run Windows

Behold the Internet of Things. Wintel Things

'Fangless' activist investor chomps up chunk of Rackspace

Blue Harbour thirsting to quaff some fresh asset sweat

Eat up Martha! Microsoft slings handwriting recog into OneNote on Android

Freehand input on non-Windows kit for the first time

Apple analyst: fruity firm set to shift 75 million iPhones

We'll have some of whatever he's having please

Super-dense flasher Skyera gets new CEO, fills pockets

+Comment Money should go towards getting product to market

Violin Memory FINALLY writes dedupe and compression into its latest Concerto

Sweet music to the ears of sysadmins

EE: STILL Blighty's best mobe network, says 'Frappucino' Moore

Fresh round of network stats fisticuffs possibly on the cards here

AMD slaps 'Radeon' label on Tosh flash: >Beard stroke< Hmm, cunning ...

Hey, you wanna SSD with that graphics card, man?

Nexenta reckons it has Edge in squeezing your object storage BLOB

Dedupe for the little guy, not just the tech titan

UK government accused of hiding TRUTH about Universal Credit fiasco

'Reset rating keeps secrets on one-dole-to-rule-them-all plan', say MPs

Call of Duty daddy considers launching own movie studio

Activision Blizzard might like quality control of a CoD film

EU justice chief blasts Google on 'right to be forgotten'

Don't pretend it's a freedom of speech issue – interim commish

Steve Jobs had BETTER BALLS than Atari, says Apple mouse designer

Xerox? Pff, not even in the same league as His Jobsiness

Caught red-handed: UK cops, PCSOs, specials behaving badly… on social media

No Mr Fuzz, don't ask a crime victim to be your pal on Facebook